Looking forward

I've been working on getting my Bachelors degree for so long that I never really thought beyond getting the paper. But I need to begin thinking about what I'm going to do with it once I have it. My first thought is take a year off, and then go to grad school for writing. I was looking at UT Austin's MA in Creative Writing today. In truth, if I am going to continue on to grad school, doing it at UT makes the most sense. I have family in the area who would put me up, so I could probably swing going full time and actually get it done in two years. But what then?

I've pretty well drifted through my life up to this point. I've never really had a focus or direction... just wandered into this or that. Which is how I've ended up working in customer service in the financial industry - and I hate it.

The only things that have consistently stayed with me through the years are my dual loves of photography and writing. Recently I've had the urge to use them both in some way to promote veganism, or benefit animal causes, or even just to make people think about their world in a more critical way. I don't have a clear vision of how this might come about, but I'm working on it. If anyone reading this has any ideas...

I'm determined

I want to be more active with my blogs this year, and try to do some real writing for them, rather than just making them a journal of my every day life. Haven't quite decided what I'm going to do yet, but I'm thinking about it. It'll gel for me eventually - always does.

It's time to really clean house and simplify my life. I have too much stuff cluttering up my home, my life, my mind. I need to pare it all back, find the core of who I am, and who I want to be - keeping only what is essential.

It's a new year

Let's hope 2008 is a big improvement on 2007. Not that the year has been all bad. I met some awesome people, and have had a lot of good times. But I've also had some of the lowest points of my life as well. I've learned a lot, including that I have a lot to learn.

This year will be about finishing school and getting out of debt. I've started working out again, now that I'm fully healed from the surgery, and I intend to actually use my many vegan cookbooks and learn to cook healthy meals for myself.

Healthy and happy in 2008! Sounds like a campaign slogan...

Christmas Eve

Just about every year for the past 18 years I've gone to my (now ex) in-law's house for dinner and gifts. Since I wasn't going to be traveling anywhere, I decided to take my ex-mil's invitation and still go this year. The ex and his s/o were there, and it was a bit strained between us at times, but all in all I'm glad I went. They're family, and even if I can't take very much of them, I still care about them. I enjoyed seeing my sister-in-law and her kids, and the baby. Having a couple of glasses of wine while I was there certainly didn't hurt.

Missing Chief continued...

Today's the fifth anniversary of my grandfather Chief's death. It's always a sad time of year for me. I miss him terribly.

My oldest dog Bear was born the same day he died - although I didn't find this out until after I already had him. I've often said Chief sent Bear to keep me from missing him so much. Caring for Bear and watching him grow into the beast he is now definitely helped me get past those first hard months after Chief's death.

I don't know that I believe in transmigration, but I do know that we're all made of energy, and energy is never destroyed - simply redistributed. So maybe some small part of Chief's energy got redistributed into Bear... it's a nice thought anyways.

Semester's almost over

Thankfully there's only one day left in this semester. It's been one of the most stressful to date, but not because of classes. I let all of my personal and health issues interfere with getting my school work done - even though I had plenty of time, and could easily have been way ahead in my studies.

I have a tendency to do this during any semester, but I was particularly bad about it this time. I will be happy to squeak a C out of one of these classes. This is not acceptable, and will not happen again. I only have 21 hours left to take, 15 if I pass both classes this semester. I have to pull it together and finish strong. I've worked too hard at maintaining my GPA above 3.5 to let it go to shit now.

On a happier note... my pups are all going to stay with me for good. For once the ex has made a reasonable, rational decision. Now if he'd just get out of my hair and go back to New Mexico.

I had a sh**ty f***ing day!

And I just want to whine and cry about it. But I don't have the time because I need to study the shit I haven't been studying enough, for the test I'm not prepared for that I have to take tomorrow. And I had a damn headache all day, and they tested the fire alarms for a solid 15 minutes at work, and I had one chat with a moron that lasted 2.5 hours, yes 2.5 hours. And another one with an even bigger moron that lasted 1.5 hours, during which he asked the same 3 questions over and over in different ways - two of which I couldn't answer, no one could answer, because they're subjective damn questions. I was so frustrated I wanted to cry by the time I finally got the asshole off my screen.

So I'm bitching up a storm and whining my ass off to no one and everyone because I want to scream and break shit and this seems like the cheaper, less messy alternative.