Saturday, March 29, 2008

I'm such a slacker, and other musings...

I'll take any excuse not to do what I need to be doing. I should have gone to work yesterday, but the ex called to see if they could come by and unload more stuff. So I stayed here and watched them load stuff up, and bs'd with them a bit.

He still says they'll be paying off my truck and giving me some money toward the joint debt I've already paid off. I believe him on the truck because he needs me to sign off on putting his vehicle in his name only, so he has an incentive to pay mine off as well. I believe he has intentions to give me more, but I'm not holding my breath. If it doesn't happen I won't be disappointed, and if it actually does happen I'll be pleasantly surprised.

He's talking about wanting to take the dogs back with him again when they get their place in NM or CO. I have very mixed feelings about this. On the one hand, he'll have a large property in the mountains for them to live on. On the other, I'll miss them terribly. But three large dogs are a major handful for one person who's trying to go to school and completely rearrange her life. I know they'd be well cared for - his fiance is a veterinarian, and he'd give his life for those dogs.

The same reasoning I gave for him bringing them back to me is about to apply in the other direction. My life is about to be in major flux. I don't know where I'm going to be living, or how long I'll be in any one place. I won't have a lot of time to spend with them - I already don't spend enough time with them as it is. As much as I don't want to admit this, it may be better for him to take them with him once he has a permanent home for them. I don't want to let them go - but I'm afraid I'll only be keeping them with me for my own selfish reasons, and not truly considering what's best for them.

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