Saturday, February 16, 2008

Ok, the pity party is over

After indulging myself in a deliciously pathetic wallow in self-pity, I'm ready to move along. Hey, if you can't throw yourself a pity party on your first spend-money-on-cards-flowers-and-candy corporate holiday as a single person after 17 years, well when can you?

Being horribly ill for the last week with bronchitis certainly didn't help my mood or energy levels either. Who can blame a person for being a little depressed when they can't sleep because they can't stop coughing at night? Not to mention that I've now used up just about all my sick time for the rest of the year. Guess that means I can't get sick again... did you hear that immune system?

In my boredom and melancholy, I ventured into the world of online dating via OkCupid. Of course all my closest matches are halfway across the country. I get the same feeling filling out the profiles on these sites as I do job applications. And I've never been very good at those either. If they're just looking for experience and qualifications, no problem. But if I'm expected to sell myself - well, I suck at that. I always have.

I gather you're supposed to put something witty in there to distinguish yourself from all the others. It's not that I'm not witty, I'm told I am quite so... but it comes through in conversation, and after I get to know someone. Perhaps I need to treat the profile as a one-sided conversation with an old friend... but then again, I wouldn't have to tell an old friend all these basic things about me because they'd already know. Ack!!

1 comment:

devolve said...

I empathize with your thoughts on the personals profile. It's really not a very good way to showcase your individual "splendor". You're more or less writing advertising copy.

My own problem with it stems from the fact that, to be honest, I'm a damned weirdo. I don't TRY to be, any more than I TRY to be right-handed or TRY to be 5'8". It just works out that way.

Obviously, this is something that is going to come shining through like a supernova in a personals profile. I have a choice between being:

* vague and dissembling - a safe but boring choice

* utterly fraudulent - pretending to be Completely Normal is not only more difficult than you'd think, but also deeply demeaning

* "myself" - personally satisfying, but with the exception of maybe 1 or 2 other weirdos who "get it" (and who invariably live half a continent away), this approach can give the impression that if I don't already have a freezer full of dead hookers and a leotard made out of human skin, I'm lookin' fill that particular void.

It's a mug's game, I guess.